Hi.

Can we talk for a bit about Woman Spreading?

We all know what man spreading is. But no one talks about woman spreading.

What is woman spreading, you ask?

It’s when a woman gets seated at the bar and takes up 16 square feet of space. The purse on the chair next to her. The coat on the hook under the chair next to her. Her wine glass, water glass and silverware pushed down the bar. The apps she hasn’t finished on the other side. Her napkin is on the floor. And she is so engrossed in conversation with her friend you have to nudge her because she doesn’t hear you say excuse me the 12 times you do.

Some do this because they aren’t paying attention. I think most do it because they hope to keep anyone from sitting next to them.

We have 23 seats at our horse shoe bar. As I mentioned earlier in the week, the restaurant started taking reservations for the bar during COVID. Of course back then half the seats were missing. People were spread out.

In May/June when restrictions were lifted, the chairs came back, and we started taking reservations for all 23 seats. The regulars love it, because they can guarantee a seat when they want it. And probably 50% of our bar guests are regulars. Another 25% of them have standing reservations. One couple has eaten at our bar over a 150 times since we started using our current reservation system. One couple has a standing Saturday night 8:00 reservation. Someone reading this tomorrow made four Sunday night reservations for the next four weeks tonight.

The people who don’t like that we take reservations are the folks who haven’t been taught how to guarantee themselves a spot. As soon as it’s explained they change their tune.

So.

We take reservations

It’s a little quieter now.

But a month ago it was quite different. 23 seats. 50+ reservations. Elbow to elbow. Constantly turning. Each reservation taken and placed as strategically as the tables in the dining room. 2 here. 3 there. Another 4 here.

I’ve also taught my staff that they have to be precise when seating someone. Count the stools if you have to. But when I say seats 13/14 I mean 13/14. A misstep means I don’t have a two top 90 minutes from now. Not to mention half the reservations have specific chairs they want to sit in. The smiths 13/14. The Joneses 19/20. Ken likes 18. Greg likes 1,2,3,4.

Woman spreading.

23 seats.

When I approach the bar with guests I have to put them next to you. Even though there are chairs open. Because in 30 minutes all the chairs will be full.

So, spreading out will not keep me from seating someone next to. It just means that I have to have an awkward conversation first. I’ll push your wine next to you, ask you to move your purse, then introduce you to your neighbors.

So restrain yourself when seated at the bar.

PS. Men are worse than women and yet they have less stuff to spread with. Sometimes I think it’s the urinal complex. They are terrified another man might sit next to them and make them seem inferior.