Some annoyances that are petty at best, but still annoy me.

Adam used to give me grief about this one.

Hi.  Do you have any reservations for tonight?  Why yes.  Yes I do.  Right now I have about 104 reservations.  Why do you ask?

What you want to know is do you have any openings for the night. 

This reminds me of being in school at the University of Kentucky and people would walk in and ask if we were building a stage.  And my professor would say, absolutely not.  The stage was built in 1946 when the building was built.  We are building scenery for a play.  And yes.  This is what color it’s going to be. 

Next one:

Do you have any tables available this week?

Yes.  Yes, I do. 

Do you want me to pick the day you are coming to eat here, or would you rather we choose.

Or they give me an assortment of dates. 

Here’s the deal.  I can move things around.  I can help you out. So give me your first pick.  And I’ll check.  If that doesn’t work, then give me your second pick.  But don’t say, any day this week. 

Next:

Don’t get pissed at me when 6:00 or 6:30 is not available.  This is when EVERYONE wants to eat.  EVERYONE. 

Next:

Know your parameters for when you want to eat. 

Every day I answer the phone and someone asks for 6:30.  I say, I can do 5:00 or 7:30 and then I have to wait while they have a conversation with 8 other people on speaker phone.  You should know if NO ONE will want to eat late.  The same thing goes for inside and outside.  Know before you call if the party is open to either. 

And please, please, please don’t be angry when you call at 4:45 and find out I don’t have room for 12 people at 5:15.  But by all means call.  Today someone called at 3:45 for a party of 11.  By 4:15 I’d booked their reservation, with our large party menu, and they loved it so much they are coming back with another large party on Friday.