I’d like to speak to the manager!!!

I don’t have a fancy business degree from an Ivy League school.

Although I did minor in business back in 1907.

However, I do know that the ultimate goal of most, not all, but most businesses is to make money.

The more the better.

So, please don’t argue with me when I say I can’t accommodate you.

Yes im sure.

No. Not even at the bar.

No I don’t have reservations for every bar seat and yes I know some are empty.

I still can’t accommodate you.

No.

Not at the empty table.

Not at the oyster bar.

I can’t do it.

And the angrier you get the less likely I am to tell you why.

But since you asked.

Im supposed to have 3 bartenders on.

I have 1 bartender.

For the whole building.

So the lovely restaurant/bar downstairs? The servers are going to come upstairs to get your drinks.

That means the one bartender I do have is making drinks for 150 people.

And it’s a lot.

A whole fucking lot.

And if I seat you at his bar he might just walk out.

And my limited business knowledge says that 1 bartender is better than no bartenders.

So no.

You can’t sit at the bar.

You can’t sit at the table.

You can’t sit at all.

And yelling at me won’t change the response.

Unless you want to bartend.