Leave a message at the tone…

I’d like to speak to the manager!!!

At 5:30 tonight, two women walk in and I ask if they have a reservation.

They say yes, and I ask for their name.

I can’t find it.

They say, we left a message.

I ask if they actually spoke with anyone.

They say no.

I think of course not.

I find them a table and get them seated.

At the end of the night, I check messages.

The two women called at 4:59 for a reservation, left a message and were surprised when they walked in at 5:25 and they didn’t have a reservation.    

Baby, it’s cold outside…

I’d like to speak to the manager!!!

Believe it or not I came home with ZERO notes tonight of things that happened.  

It might be a first.

At least that was the case until I read an online review on Trip Advisor.

The review is from the guy who left a bad survey after being forced to eat outside, after he made a reservation to eat outside and it was cold.  

He fancies himself a clever writer.

He starts:

All the hype is there: the concept, the location, chef, menu -and service team … BUT, it all went rapidly downhill from there. 
Management doesn’t appear to be interested in or responsible for the back 50′ area beyond – which after dark in September, is cold enough to freeze ice cubes.   

I am truly sorry that you made a reservation that we honored.  Truly sorry.  Had we not had the patio open that night, you’d have been just as angry about the cancellation of your reservation.  You had every opportunity to call and change it.  You had every opportunity, to be responsible for your own well-being.  

As for the back 50’, we are very interested in it.  We make a lot of people happy back there from May to October.  Chef has spent a lot of time and energy making it beautiful.  And special.  And fun.  It has doubled the size of our restaurant.  

As for ice cubes, 55 degrees is not cold enough to freeze ice cubes.  BUT.  As you noted, it is September in Maine.  And the weather turns chilly and there’s nothing to do about that.  

He continues:

No mitigation with offering blankets or throws – let alone heat lamps to make the dinner experience acceptable. There seemed to be little interest that my guests and I felt freezing, unhappy and parked in the boonies for an expensive dinner.

No.  We do not offer blankets.  I personally find them gross.  People eat dinner with them.  Get food on them.  Wipe their hands with them.  And then a few minutes later they are given to another guest.  As for heat lamps, our patio is fucking huge.  We are not five tables, on a concrete slab as many people expect when they arrive.  There are almost 20 tables out there.  All spaced, judiciously away from each other.  Chef got a quote to get heaters and run propane and we’d have to generate about 30 times more revenue than we do to pay for it.  

Also, you are in Maine.  In the fall.  Wear a jacket.  

This is my favorite part:

 “Howard, the Manager” never appeared to see what he might do to put things right. 

You are absolutely right.  I never appeared.  That’s because I was on the door, getting people seated.  You also, never asked to see a manager.  There was no reason for me to come see you as you chose to eat outside, you were seated outside, there were no problems with your food and service.  I don’t generally appear at tables, where we have delivered on our promise.  

And:

There are some misrepresentations on the wine list Studio by Mival Rose is 
misrepresented as Mirval. 

It is misrepresented by actually stating that it is Studio.  There is a couple of dollars difference in the price of the wine you are suggesting we are trying to pass off as Studio and Studio.  I doubt the degree of quality is that different.  

And still more:

Our server was marvellous: charming, knowledgable and appologetic that were were about to ‘freeze our goolies off’… 

I’m sure your server was apologetic.  He’d be bad at his job if he wasn’t.  I would love to point out that it was 55* that night.  In the whole, big, wide world, you are acting like a spoiled 6 year old.  Pull it together, your life is not that hard, if you can afford to travel across the country, stay in a resort town and eat in an expensive restaurant.  Seriously.  First world problems.  

And finally:

.. no blankets, and definitely no table cloths to throw over our freezing bodies. “Too bad, so sad”… 
Could have been great -but a bit of smoke and mirrors a the end of the summer season. I came, I tried, I cried and will not be returning.

I think we are with that.    

But let’s be honest.  You won’t NOT be returning because of your experience.  You won’t be returning because you live on the west coast of Canada and it’s not like you were going to pop in a week from now.  

Phone rings…

I’d like to speak to the manager!!!

I was on the door tonight.

As is going to be the case for the next 9 months.

The phone rings, I answer and say thank you for calling how may I help you.

There is static on the line so I tell the person that I can’t hear them and hang up.

The phone rings again, I know from caller ID it’s the same person.

She is clear as a bell now.

She says, hi this is Mary, I need to cancel my reservation for Sunday night.

I say great, cancel the reservation, thank her for letting us know and hang up

12 seconds later the phone rings again.

I say, thank you for calling how may I help you.

The woman says, hi this is Mary, I need to cancel my reservation for Sunday night.

I wait.

She repeats herself.

I say, didn’t I just speak with you.

She replies, yes. But I wanted to make sure you cancelled the reservation.

I thanked her again for letting me know and hung up.

What’s in a name???

I’d like to speak to the manager!!!

I’m really bad at names.  Like really bad.

I’m not much better with faces.

I’ll know I know you, however I won’t remember how I know you.

I don’t take offense when people don’t remember my name.  

What’s funny, is that more times than I can count I’ve been called Kevin.

Hello, is this Kevin?

Hi, Kevin, how was your weekend?

So many times.

I hardly ever correct them and I don’t want to embarrass them.

And I’ve been called worse.  

I know some very excellent Kevins.  

An exercise in patience….

I’d like to speak to the manager!!!

Hello, thank you for calling how may I help you?

I was calling to see if you were open.

Yes, we are.

Will you be open till you standard closing time of 8:30.

Tonight, our last reservation is at 8:00.  

You don’t have any openings?

What do you mean?

You don’t have any open reservations for tonight?

Yes, we have open reservations.  (I have no idea what is going on).  Do you need a reservation for tonight?  

Yes, do you have room for 2?

What time would you like to come in?  

Do you have 6:30?

Yes, I can take 2 people at 6:30.  

How about 7:00?

Yes, I can take 2 people at 7:00.  

Can you take 2 people between 6:30 and 7:00?

Do you mean 6:45?

No, between 6:30 and 7:00?

Uh.  No.  I can only take 2 people at 6:30.  (I’m so lost).

Great, we’ll take it. 

Can I get your phone number starting with the area code?

Yes, it’s 555.555.5555

Is this John Smith?

Yes it is.

Great. You are all set.  2 people at 6:30. 

Thank you….Can I ask a question?

Can you take 3 people at 6:30?

What?

Can you take 3 people at 6:30?

What?

Can you take 3 people at 6:30.  

Uh.  No.  I can’t take 3 people at 6:30.  I can take 3 people at 7:00.

But you can’t take us at 6:30.

I’m sorry, no.  I can’t seat 3 people at 6:30 but I can seat you at 7:00.

Great.  We’ll take it.

All right you are all set.

Can I ask another question?

Yes, is it okay if we come at 7:00 but the third comes late.  Will you seat us or will you make us wait?

What?

Yes, our third is coming from class and won’t get out till around 7:20.  He can’t meet us until 7:30.  

Yes, we can accommodate you and we’ll seat you when you get here.

Great.  Thank you.

___________________________

___________________________

Hello, thank you for calling how may I help you?

Hi, this is John Smith.  I need to change our reservation to 2.  Our third person won’t be able to a make it.

Great, you are all set.

Can we still get the 6:30.

I’m sorry, no, I only have 7:00 for 2 people now.

Are you sure?

Yes, I’m sure.

Thank you.

Thank you!

Call me by my name!!!

I’d like to speak to the manager!!!

Tonight, we had guests arrive at 5:00.  

They are seated at table #21.  

The person who sat them comes back and asks if they can move to another table.  

I say yes, they can move to table #31.  

The person returns 90 seconds later to say that they want table #12.

Here’s the thing, table #12 is reserved for Chef’s best friend who is visiting from out of town.   I’m in the middle of telling the person this when the woman who is being seated appears in the lobby.

She proceeds to tell me she comes all the time and they don’t understand why they can’t have the table just as much as anyone else.  

I say, you can sit there but I need the table back by 6:00.  

She says of course.  

They eat and leave by 6:00.

I look at their reservation history.  They’ve eaten at our restaurant 4 times in the last two years.  The last time was in May.  I’d hardly call that all the time.

And, I’m serious, it’s only a matter of time till I look at someone and say, if you eat here all the time what is my name?  

Whistle a happy tune!!!

I’d like to speak to the manager!!!

I wrote this post three days ago and saved it to post on a night when I don’t work.  Adam suggested I write ahead so that I always have posts to share.

From Friday night:

I walked into the dining room tonight just behind Bob who was going to a dirty table to clean it.  

As I stepped behind him, I heard someone snapping their fingers, then I heard someone clap their hands twice and say, Bob, hey Bob.  

He didn’t hear them, but I certainly did.  

I turned and glared at them. 

Then I followed Bob to the wait station and said, table #25 just snapped at you, so I am assuming they need you. 

For those not in the business reading this, NEVER, EVER, EVER snap at a server to get their attention.

Nothing you need is that important, unless your guest is having an allergic reaction and needs an shot to the heart to survive, like in Kill Bill.

This is your public service announcement for the day.  

Update from today:

I was headed to my office to get my laptop, when I hear a whistle and realize that table #14 has their head stuck out of their room and is looking for someone.  They call me over, to tell me their chicken is undercooked. 

It’s not.  We smoke out chicken.  It’s smoked for hours before it’s served.  It was cooked through before they ever ordered it.  

Second, don’t fucking whistle at me.  You can only whistle at me if you are Ryan Reynolds or Jason Mamoa and you are about to fulfil a lifelong fantasy.  

Don’t do it.  

Whatever happened to class???

I’d like to speak to the manager!!!

A story shared by a server tonight…

One of my servers comes up to say that table #37 when asked if they’d like to hear about dessert said and I quote, 

“Just bring me a spoon so she can eat out my ass.”

He replied, unfortunately that’s not on the menu.  

And that my friends is class.  

Through and through.  

The power of negative thinking…

I’d like to speak to the manager!!!

We’ve had three bad reviews on Google, in the last three days.  This is not normal for us.  

I’d like to address them:

1.

First, let me say I was very excited to try this place. I had nothing but high hopes after countless recommendations. What followed was nothing short of the worst meal/experience of my life.

My wife and I ordered 2 Porterhouse steaks. Both of them to be cooked medium rare. They came out medium well. We ordered mashed potatoes (which had 2 hairs in them). When they replaced our whole meal, it came back out cold. The waitress basically threw the food down onto the table and refused to wait on us for the rest of the night. I went thirty minutes without water (I have severe acid reflux.. this could have been an emergency). I will never recommend this place to anyone. STAY AWAY IF YOU DONT WANT HAIRY FOOD AND BAD SERVICE.

How do I start?

How do I put this politely?  

BULLSHIT!!!

I call bullshit.

Why you say?

Well first, my staff knows that I want to know about every re-cook.  Whether it’s a burnt steak, or a steak that just needs to be cooked a little more I want to know.  So the odds of tables entire order being re-cooked without me knowing is very slim.  

If a server had food with a hair in it, I’m about 99.9999% sure I’d have heard about it.  I’d definitely have needed to make a table visit.  

Also, the odds of two porterhouse steaks being re-cooked and chef not knowing about it would be very, very slim.  He has no recollection of two porterhouses being over-cooked and having to make two new ones.  

The review says the waitress, basically threw the food down on the table…we have food runners.  Lots and lots of food runners.  Our servers run about .001 percent of their own food.  Of all the restaurants I’ve ever worked in, the servers run very little of their own food.  In fact, it’s highly unlikely that any server ran food that night.  

As for the acid reflux, I’m supposing that if you’d really need a glass of water in a life or death situation your wife would have spoken up.

And the post says a waitress brought their food, and so that tells me it’s not the bar, it’s not 30% of the staff.  Last night, I had about an hour till the dishwashers finished up, so I went through the last week’s orders.  All of he two tops, served by women.  And what would you know, there are no tables, with two porterhouses, served by women.  

I call bullshit!!!

2.

I made the rez about 5 weeks in advance -for a birthday dinner. I requested outside seating if the weather would be warm enough, which it totally wasn’t. The manager said that they had no inside tables. Outside seating has neither heat lamps, nor blankets to throw over guests who are freezing. One server told me bluntly “NO we don’t have any blankets”! as if I’d asked for a fur-lined coat.
If the restaurant had called earlier in the day and said that it was going to be between 54F and 60F after dark – and that we might want to bring our own blankets and such, we would have been prepared – though may have opted for elsewhere.
The server was knowledgable and friendly, and apologetic. I was so excited about the Argentinian BBQ style but was very disappointed – mostly with though meat -which soon turned very cold. The Empanadas were excellent. The listed Wine “Mirval” Rosé is misrepresented on the wine list – as its actually Studio by Mirval – a lower standard/taste. Note, The bottles of wine ordered by guests appear to be there for self-service.?? Hmmm.
We were so freezing and disappointed with the meal that we just paid and left. I wouldn’t return or recommend the restaurant. Oh… and the sign outside the front of the restaurant refers to “Pulled Pork” which my sister loves – the server advised that was from a previous restaurant 4 years ago.
There may be a lot of sizzle going on at the asado/grill in the kitchen, but the execution of the overall restaurant experience has fallen flat.

Let me break this one down for you…

He made the reservation on August 9.  Yes, about 5 weeks ago and I’m sure he had no thought of Maine in September, but their request did not say should it be warm enough.  His request said, if inclement weather, move inside.  Yesterday, was a beautiful late summer/early fall day.  Yes, it was about 60* but fun fact, you can watch the weather as easily as I can.  We had 6 tables seated on the patio after you and they all had a great time.  

It was actually not a server who told him, NO we don’t have any blankets.  It was a host, who he’d already asked several times about blankets as if she was going to pull one out of thin air for him.  

The list wine, Mirval Rose is misrepresented on the wine list- as it’s actually Studio by Mirval.   It’s misrepresented by the menu by listing it as Rose, Miraval Studio, FR.  If by misrepresentation you mean by listing it as it actually is then by all means it’s misrepresented.  

The sign you mention, is food items that are frequently served in chef’s area of the world.  It is a sign on the side of a building.  It is not intended to be a menu. And I didn’t ask but I’m sure your server never said it was from another restaurant 4 years ago.  It was a graphic design placed on the front of the building when we opened 4 years ago.   

To sum it up nicely, you were mad that you made a reservation 5 weeks ago, during the hot summer months and didn’t change it to inside, after the weather turned.  So, you made up other things to be mad about.  

3. 

Please be careful about deciding to spend your money here. Especially if you arrive alone. Apparently there is a policy that the bar is a reservation-onlyat dinner time. Unusual but fine; not posted anywhere that I saw. I had been here a month ago and the hostesses said that while there were no tables available, I could sit at the bar to have dinner. I did, and really enjoyed it.

Fast forward to tonight. I assumed the bar was always first come first served for dinner as it appeared to be on my last visit. A front desk manager (a man who was not present on my last visit), hastened over to tell me that all bar seats were reserved/reservation only- very sorry. I got up, but shared with him that I hadn’t known that because the last time, the hostesses welcomed me to sit at the bar. Period. End of story. When I told the young man this, he told me THAT DIDN’T HAPPEN. Accused me of lying then said “I’m not having this encounter with you here.”
I’m furious to have been treated so high-handedly. To be accused of lying? In what world. For shame.

I’ll start by saying, I had a conversation if you can call it that with this person while they were in the restaurant, she left a message on our voicemail, and a review.  My response will be combining the three sources. 

I’m always amazed at people, who think any restaurant takes pleasure in turning away guests.  Yes, my bonus at the end of the year, isn’t based on revenue and financials at all, it’s based purely on the number of people I turn away at the door.  

The fact that you were single has no bearing in this story.  None at all.  

Our bar is not reservation only – only at dinner time.  We are not open for lunch.  And it’s not reservation only. However, we do take reservations, so if it is fully reserved as it was for the first turn tonight, I’ll have no stools for you to sit on.  And all of your protestations won’t fix that, because if I allow you to stay at the bar, what will I tell the people who do have reservations.  Also, had you not stormed out I could have offered you a table which I’d have had.   And yes, we don’t post a sign at the door that says we take reservations at the bar.  I don’t know any restaurant that does that. 

Yes, a month ago, you might have been told you could sit at the bar to have dinner, done so and enjoyed it.  However, what you said in the moment and what you said on your voicemail are simply not true.  In the 15+ months I’ve been employed here, at no time has anyone told a guest, they could just seat themselves at the bar.  Not even on a Wednesday in January.  Also, as you said on your voicemail there were two girls at the host stand on August 14th, when you came in alone for your birthday.  Simply not true.  We have this thing called a schedule, that I double checked tonight and we had one host scheduled for the evening and she was outside.  Guess what that means.  Yours truly would have been on the door and would have never told you that you could sit anywhere.  PS. You told me in person, and on the phone that I was not here the night you were here.  And guess what again, I’ve missed one shift in 7 months and it was two days ago….

You probably were welcomed to sit at the bar.  In a seat assigned by us.  Last time you checked in with the host.  Tonight, you did not. You pushed your way through the lobby and sat yourself, then told me that you were told to seat yourself in August.  Which as I told you tonight, I can assure you did not happen. 

I did not accuse you of lying, I said that I know for a fact that you were never told to sit anywhere you like.  And I’m pretty sure, I said I’m not having this conversation with you, as you were looking for a fight, I didn’t have time to have.  

I also did not treat you as trash as you suggested on the phone.  I simply told you that you could not sit at the bar and you immediately pushed back.  The only way, I’d have been seen as not rude tonight would have been to allow you to keep your seats and tell the people who’d made reservations, sorry, she got here first, when they arrived.  

Three reviews. 

What would Suze Orman Do?

I’d like to speak to the manager!!!

On Thursday night, I got to leave work at 5:15 to go to a Chamber of Commerce event, where we won a little award. 

First, it’s the first shift I’ve missed since I was sick in February.  

It was nice to leave work while it was still daylight outside.  

Second, the event ended early, so I was able to meet a friend and try out a new restaurant near my restaurant.  

It was really good.  Service was good.  Food even better.  Space quite nice.  

Over dinner last night we discussed the award we won.  

We got a silver award for best place for a FIRST DATE.

And that brought up the discussion about how expensive should a restaurant be on a first date.  

Should it be casual?  Inexpensive?  Do you throw caution to the wind and just go for it?

My young staff all said, Applebee’s is a good place for a first date.  

My older staff said absolutely not.

One person said, never go expensive until you know the deal is sealed.  

What are your thoughts? 

Do you go all out and spend money to impress them?

Or are you cautious and meet for coffee at Starbucks?