Edit: Read to the end.
A couple of weeks after I started working at the restaurant, a fellow server asked me if I’d change sections with him. I was new and didn’t know any better so I said yes. Well to be honest with you, the reason I said yes was because it was in the main dining room and I wouldn’t have to go up and down stairs. (Edit: I was already in my 40’s, old and fat. The steps were killer). We were very busy that night and I made a small fortune.
The particular section that I was in was considered the “cocktail” section. What this means is that the people I’m waiting on sit at high top cocktail tables or at a counter that seats 10 guests. They are offered the same menu and the same service as the rest of the restaurant. This section was not, however, part of the host’s rotation. The customers either seat themselves, or I go into the lobby and tell a group of people that they can skip the wait list (sometimes over two hours long) and come sit down immediately. Most people agree to do this, although occasionally people don’t want to sit at the high-tops or the counter.
At any given time I’m waiting on 3 four top tables and 5 couples at the counter. 22 people at one time, 7 different “tables.” It’s fast and furious.
This system works great, especially when we are busy. The chairs are constantly filled and often people sit down to be waited on before the leaving patrons have put their coats on. What this means is that the tables tend to turn a lot faster and you can get people in and out the door pretty quickly. When we are on a wait, only people who are eating can sit at these tables. If you are in just to drink, then you should sit at the bar. This insane pace means that you work a lot harder and faster than most of the other servers but you also make more money than they do. LOTS more money.
After that first night, I went to the server manager and told her that she could schedule me in cocktails anytime she wanted. I loved the pace and more than anything I loved the money. She took this to heart and now I’m only scheduled in the cocktail section. This makes me very happy because I make more money, and it make the managers happy because I do a good job. You would think that everyone would want to work in these sections based on the sales numbers and the tips you make. But it’s far from the truth. There really are only about 5 servers who will work there. For most, the pace is just too fast and you have to work way too hard. (Edit: A fellow server that I had made mad once asked how I could move so fast at fat as I was. I moved FAST). And this is what I loved. At any given moment I have 7 to 10 checks open, getting people what they want. (Edit: I used to make the managers mad because I never closed any of my checks. I’d have 7 pages of checks open. And I never fucked up a table number or rang something on the wrong check). I also discovered that if I tipped the bartenders well at the end of the night, they’d make my drinks first. So if you order a drink from me, it will be on your table in three to four minutes. (Edit: This was so true that new bartenders were told this on their first training shift. The bussers and food runners also took care of me. I was tipping LOTS and LOTS of money each night). So I work hard and make a lot of money.
And so why am I telling you all of this? Well as I mentioned, if no one sits down immediately at one of my tables I go into the lobby and find people to fill the chairs. A couple of nights ago, I pulled four women out of the lobby and gave them a table. They were a hoot. One of them was from New Orleans and the rest of them were from Nashville. They gave me a hard time, and I gave them a hard time right back. We spent the hour they were with me doing a lot of laughing. At one point I walked up to the table and they said, “Can we ask you a question?” I said, “Sure.” “Why did you pick us, out of all the people in the lobby, to come sit at your table?” I took a deep breath and said, “I can’t tell you.” The laughed but were persistent. Finally I said, “It’s because as I walked by you, you were speaking English without an accent.” (Edit: a foreign accent).
What followed was a lot of questions about my answer. I explained to them that we get a lot of foreign tourists, and although most know to tip, a lot either just don’t do it, or aren’t aware they are supposed to. Either way, I’ll take my chances with an American table any day of the week.
The question I have is: “Is it wrong to think this way?” I was talking to a couple of waiters the other night at the bar, and the discussion turned to people who tip. And the consensus of the group was that the minute you start waiting tables it makes you think in ways that you don’t always approve of.
There are certain groups of people who tend to not tip well. I realize it’s a generalization but when you work in a restaurant long enough you see the consistency enough to realize that the stereotypes don’t create themselves. People who order their steaks well done don’t tip as well as people who order them medium rare. Smokers tip better than non-smokers. Anyone who uses 1000 island dressing isn’t going to tip well. If they order Long Island Teas they don’t tip as well as if they order Dewar’s on the rocks. Anyone who orders a Strawberry Daiquiri isn’t going to tip well. If they use their AAA discount they are going to leave less. If they get something for free they won’t tip as well as if they didn’t. Black people don’t tip as well as white people. (See below for commentary on this). Foreigners don’t tip as well as Americans. People from the south don’t tip as well as northerners. Baptists don’t tip as well as Jewish people. The Irish don’t tip as well as the Londoners.
I could go on. I have been in the restaurant business off and on since 1987 and all of these generalizations hold true. And what that means, is that I walk into the lobby and I make decisions about who I want to sit in my section based on what people look like. How they speak. What they are wearing. How they are behaving. All because at the end of the hour they spend with me, I want them to leave the most amount of money possible. And I hate that I do this. I hate that I’m reduced to this. But then again I need to pay my rent.
So what are your thoughts on this? I’d love to hear what you guys think?
(Big fucking edit at this point. Me speaking today, July 18, 2022)
I knew this post was coming. I’ve been searching for it.
I posted this in 2009.
At the time my roommate read my posts, and this lead to a very interesting conversation.
He told me that just weeks prior he’d read an article that said the reason most minorities don’t tip well is that they don’t get the same service. They are approached and waited on by people who assume they won’t tip. So. They get less than stellar service and they tip accordingly.
I thought about this a lot over the next few days. A lot.
So.
I told myself that I never wanted that to be me.
So I changed my attitude at work.
And I started assuming everyone was going to tip no matter who they were.
And fun fact: The tipping changed. Did I still get shitty tips from foreigners? Yes, but not as much. I learned that if I brought them to myside they’d generally take care of me.
For example, my co-workers when asked, for mea onea beer, by non-English speaking guests they would just give them Budweiser. I’d give them the choice of all of our beers. Bud, Bud Light, Guinness, Stella, Heineken, Sam Adams, Shock Top. (I said that list 1,039 times a night). Fun fact: They don’t speak English. They don’t live in a hole. They knew all the beers and knew what they wanted.
Same with food. I asked the questions. I took time to get to know them.
If a table said “do you speaka Spanish? (Always Spanish people, never from Latin America), I’d joke and say muy, muy, poco. (very, very little), followed by Donde esta el bano (Where is the bathroom?), we’d all laugh but they were on my team.
As for people of color, I truly believe, 15 year years later that it’s true. People assume. And they get what they earn.
Yes, I still had people stiff me. But it was a lot less.
My co-workers would always ask why I had such a large percentage after tip out and it was because after the talk with my roommate I changed my ways.
Many of my friends from HRC, might not know this but just before I left, I held three classes, before work, with new employees, to coach them on how to make money from tourists. I actually still have my notes somewhere.
I will finish with some of the stereotypes ARE true. Smokers do tip more than non-smokers. I think it’s because they tend to be more fun. If someone orders 1,000 island dressing, they don’t know what they are doing. Same with well-done steaks. Baptists tip like shit and are rude especially after church. And anyone who orders a Long Island Tea is either under aged, or from New Jersey, so good luck.
But if you treat people of color and foreigners with kindness, and warmth, and an interest in treating them well, you might find that the stereotype is a reaction to bad service and NOT that certain people just don’t tip.
I'd Like to Speak to the Manager!!! 