I’d like to speak with the manager!!!

Today in a nut shell. 

We closed the patio today. 

But it’s not raining they all said.  

Yes, but at 4:00 it was 60 degrees.  And dropping quickly.  Who had using the heat in your car on June 18 as a thing.  

I’ve mentioned this before, but we close the patio when it’s cold, not because the guests will be cold but because if you spend 60 bucks on a steak, you don’t want YOUR steak to be cold 90 seconds after it’s put in front of you.  And especially your mashed potatoes.  

The patio was closed. 

At 4:20 the host takes a call.  She listens for about 2 minutes and hands me the phone.  

The woman on the other end of the phone IS pissed.

Super pissed.

She booked 3 weeks ago.  She asked then if the patio would be open.  She was told yes.

She called 5 days ago to see if the patio would be open.  She was told yes.

She called yesterday and was told that the patio would be open.  

She is saying all this at me.  

It is outrageous that the patio is closed after all this planning.

We should have called her yesterday to tell her this.  Especially after telling her the patio would be open.  

She is on a tangent.  

I explain, that unfortunately, it’s not as warm as we expected so we’ve been forced to close it.

This is unacceptable. 

I am listening trying to come to a solution, but she won’t stop yelling at me.  

I try to ask what her name is, and how many in her party but she keeps on yelling at me.

Finally, she says she’s going to eviscerate us on social media.  

Please for the sake of all things…do not say this to me.

Because I promise I’ll respond in the following way:  I won’t be held hostage by a threat of a review on social media.  

And I said that, and she lost her shit.

And I said do what you have to do.

And hung up. 

She was still yelling when I hit end on the cordless phone.

So far, no message.  

But it was not a fun way to start the night.  

Fast forward 60 minutes and I’m called to table 25.  

As I walk toward the table, I realize I know them.  

I greet the table and shake hands with the man at the table.

He says to me, I hear you were playing (I don’t remember what action hero he called me) but he was referring to Friday night.

A friend of mine, drives for him as he owns a car service in town.

We then spent about 10 minutes comparing horror stories, with him telling me that once he left a passenger at a restaurant that is even more remote than hours after the guy was a complete ass.  

We all chatted, until the host interrupted to tell me I was needed at table G9.

Uh. OH.

I knew about this table. 

It is a two top.  

They each sent their steak back 2 times.  

I get to the table and have the following exchange.

We made our reservation weeks ago and you’ve sat us at the worst table.  

Uh.  You made your reservation Friday night.  And that is why you are sitting here.

It’s also not the worst table.  It’s really not.

But I reply, I’m sorry to hear that you feel that way.  Lots of people enjoying sitting here.

He tells me it’s ridiculous that they are by the wait station.  

Fun fact.  There is a wait station in every restaurant.  And what make that a bad table.  Only 2 servers are using it, they are both quiet people.

It’s ridiculous that they are seated near an exit door.

Sorry, sir.  Every restaurant has exits.  And most have tables that are there.  

And I’m seated next to an old lawn mower.

Actually, it’s a vintage scooter that chef has owned for years and has been in the restaurant since we opened.  Most people take picture with it, instead of complaining that it’s a lawn mower.  

He goes on.  

This meal was terrible.

We had to send our steaks back twice.  Because it was cold and undercooked.  

Well sir, you ordered your steak medium rare.  Which is supposed to have a cool red center, AND steak is not meant to be eaten hot.  It’s allowed to rest before it is served.  

It was undercooked both time.

Sir, I’m sorry to hear that.

It also did not have a good flavor.  In fact, I could have gotten a better steak at Longhorn for half the money.

I’m sorry you feel that way sir.

Yes, the French fries were the only good thing about the meal.

Yes, our fries are indeed quite good.  

I will say, the service was great.  I’m not complaining about the service.  

Thank you, sir.

We are here to celebrate father’s day and in my opinion this is the worst dining experience I have ever had in all of my 70 years.  

I should say, I’m getting annoyed, because they were perfectly fine with the table, until we sat a party of 9 with 5 horrible children next to him.  

The conversation is also, not nearly as calm as I’ve written it.  He’s is pissed, and I’m having a hard time with it, because our food is second to none.  Our décor is second to none.  

And when he said, in 70 years I’ve never had a worse dining experience, I might have said, well sir then I’d suggest you eat out more.  

I know, I know, I know.

I shouldn’t have, but I did.

He is clearly looking for something for free.

However, his plate is clean. 

I ask if I can take his plate.  He says yes.

His wife asks for a to go box.  

If it’s so bad why are you taking it with you.  

I leave.  

I go back to table 25 and tell them it’s their fault this just happened.

90 minutes later they post a review on a page called Lyman:  The happening.  

The review:

Website is utterly deceiving.  Zero ambience.  Nothing special as far as the steak.  A sports bar that caters to large parties.  Waitstaff is top notch.  Even with a reservation at opening time, we were given the wort table in the house, the hallway next to the service door, which also served as the server station and the outside door.  Manager visited our table after multipe requests.  Told him that this was my worst restaurant experience in 70 years of life and he told me I “needed to eat out more.”

Steak entrees had to be sent back TWICE.  Undercooked both times.  Ordered medium rare.  Both times we received the same cut of meat.  After second refire they didn’t even bother with the garnish.  I’ve had better steak at Longhorn for a whole lot less $. 

Save your hard earned $.  Lots of better places out there. 

As I’ve already said.

The summer people are here. 

I’d like to speak to the manager!!!

I hate practical jokes.

Hate them.

Tonight we had an event at our new restaurant.

An event I’ve been saying no to since March.

But I was over ruled.

And it happened.

There was no manager there to supervise.

So I left just as the first guests were arriving 30 minutes early.

The party started.

And at 4:50 I’m called to the kitchen where chef shows me a text that said

Space is beautiful but service and drinks suck.

He was clearly annoyed.

I walked away thing fuck fuck fuck.

I was annoyed all night that someone we would do a favor for would do this.

At 8:00 chef asks me to go over and checkin.

I’m expecting a big complaint.

But I learn about 3 minutes after arriving it was a joke.

They told chef five minutes after the text was sent.

No one told me.

They all thought it was so funny.

Not me.

Didn’t find it funny.

Not at all.

I’d like to speak to the manager.

We have regulars.

Who are the worst if the worst.

The come late.

They treat the staff like crap.

And everyone. And I mean everyone hates them.

They were in tonight.

They are difficult beyond compare.

They don’t order anything as it comes.

Special prep this.

Special prep that.

And what sucks is that we tell everyone else no.

Meanwhile.

They are mediocre tippers.

And.

Tonight they asked for their three bottles of wine on a separate check. Paid it. And left a big fat 0 on the tip line.

I’m running out of servers to wait on them.

I’d really love to have the server, next time they are in, drop the bottle of wine on the table, with a wine key, 4 plastic cups, and say enjoy.

The server fetches the wine. Presents, and opens the wine. Pours the wine. Keeps the glasses topped off. Polishes the glasses. Sets the table. Clears the table.

It’s ridiculous.

I’d like to speak with the manager!!!

Anyone have June 16 as the first asshole of the season on your calendar?

It’s 7:20.

I’m at the door because things are getting hectic.

At exactly 7:31 a group walks in.

I ask them if the have a reservation and the young man in front of me gives me his name.

I say yes. Thank you. You are scheduled at 8:00. It will be closer to 8 before I can get you seated.

He’s nice.

I should mention that it’s an 8-top.

The father/grandfather gets involved and let’s me know he booked for 7:30.

I check the reservation.

It is for 8:00.

I tell him that.

He asks where they can wait.

I explain that I don’t have a place for them to wait.

He tells me that I’ll have to open the terrace then.

I tell him that’s not going to happen.

He repeats that he made the reservation for 7:30.

I assure him that it is for 8:00, explaining that we don’t take 8 top reservations in June, on Friday, at 8:00.

He tells me this is unacceptable.

I go back to trying to get people seated.

He waits about two minutes and asks if I’m working on a solution.

I tell him that I am not and that I can get him seated at 8:00.

I should mention the lobby is full.

The vestibule is full.

There are people waiting outside.

Things have backed up.

I am desperately trying to get people in seats.

I take the iPad and go into the dining room.

On my way back the man meets me in the bar area and begins to berate me.

He tells me that it’s unacceptable that I am not seating him. That we have lost 8 good customers. That he will be sure to share his displeasure with his friends. He will share his displeasure on line. And that I will be sorry that I am not helping him. And on and on and on.

He gets more intense and louder as he goes on.

He stops.

I say come with me.

I lead him into the lobby, open the door and explain, that I’m done. He can go elsewhere fir dinner. But good luck finding a place that can accommodate an 8 top at 8:00 without a reservation on a Friday in June.

I should mention that as I say this they are French Canadian. Only the young man and the guy yelling at me speak English. His wife asks him in French what is happening and she is shocked.

He tells me he is outraged and that he is going to tell everyone about this and I’ll be sorry.

As he exits the last door he asks my name.

I follow him out and say my name is Jeff.

Spelled. J. E. F. F.

Be sure to spell it correctly.

I’m the GM.

When I walk back in there is applause.

Everyone apologizes for his behavior and tells me how glad they are I didn’t allow him to talk to me like that.

I look at everyone and say summer is here.

At this point tables are reset.

I start seating people.

They all shake my hand as they go in.

I apologize for the distraction.

They are all so sweet.

And as I said to my staff.

The summer people are here.

I’d like to speak to the manager!!!

Well.

Who had more arthritis on your Jeff bingo card.

Had my knee doctor appointment today.

At 11:30.

Adam went with me to make sure I advocated from myself.

As much as I talk about confrontation at work I very much shy away from it.

Got there.

Dr came in.

I have to say that after 6 years I like him a lot.

He’s knowledgeable, explains everything, and is funny.

If anyone cares he went to UCSD medical school. We discussed this at one of my first appointments.

First he asked me about the pain over the weekend.

Then the numbness in my foot.

He had me take off my shoes and socks.

Did a little pressure test to make sure it wasn’t anything super serious.

Then he pulled up a diagram of the nerves of the foot and had me point to where I was numb.

It corresponded to a nerve from the back.

So we did an X-ray.

And we discovered that I have arthritis in my back.

It’s not presenting with pain yet, but it is pinching a nerve that goes to my foot.

He presented me with a million options.

MRI.

Physical therapy.

Nerve testing.

Meds.

Others I don’t remember.

I am going to schedule an mri to determine how serious it is.

I’m going to start physical therapy.

And I’m starting gabapwntin for the nerve damage, which he said should help with sleep.

So there you have.

He also pretty much said I was playing with fire with my knee.

He explained that it was not going to get better. That we had exhausted all avenues for relief.

He said I was going to wake up one morning and not be able to tolerate the pain.

That I wouldn’t go to the bathroom because it hurt too much.

So.

I called today and changed my surgery to the third week of October.

16 weeks.

Keep your fingers crossed that I make it.

I also won’t be taking anymore cortisone shots since I have to wait 90 days for surgery after the shot.

So there you have it.

I’d like to speak with the manager!!!

As of the Wednesday, after Memorial Day, we have been opening at 4:30.

For the past two summers, by 4:30 there are 10 cars in the lot, waiting to come in.

If we get those 20+ people in seats at 4:30 then we can add more covers to the total for the night.

Today we opened at 4:30. 

We had three tables sat almost right away.

I noticed a group of people coming in, and I knew we had no more reservations till 5:00, so I headed to the host stand.  

I get there, just as the host turns and says, here he is now.

I say, hello, how I can I help you.

And the man in front of me says, “What do you think about 14 people?”

I ask him to clarify.

He says we are a party of 14 can we get seated.

I look at the I-pad, but I already know the answer.

I apologize and say, unfortunately, no.  We can’t accommodate 14 people tonight.

But it’s right at open.  Surely there is room

Unfortunately, no.

What about if we split up. 

Unfortunately, no.

Are you sure?

Yes, unfortunately no.

And then he said:  WHY NOT?  

I say excuse me?

He says, why not.  Why can’t you seat us.  

I truly wish, I’d just said, because I said so.  

But instead, I said.

Well, first off any party over 8 triggers a pre-fixe menu and that would have needed to be arranged well before now, with me, the servers and the chef.

2^nd, the Gallery where we can put a party of 14 is closed tonight, (we were filming a TV thing today) and even if it weren’t closed, we don’t have staff out there because we didn’t have any large parties on the books.

3^rd, the patio isn’t staffed for a 14 top, because it’s going to rain in 2 hours, 

4^th, we can’t split you up because the dining room is fully booked until 7:30 tonight. 

So, NO, we can’t accommodate you.

He was ANNOYED.

It was the I can’t believe you are going to turn away business attitude.

Fun fact, that I’ve discussed several times today.

We say no to business all the time.

And I do mean all the time.

We always make the decision that is best for the restaurant, long before we make a decision for the guest. 

It might seem counterintuitive to not say yes to everyone.  

But that is not the case.

And I dare say, it’s true in most businesses.  

That not every offer to accommodate a business deal is a good one.  

So, I turned away the 14-top.

And I really wish I’d said, because I said so.  

I’d like to speak with the manager!!!

Okay.

First.

Thank you to everyone who has reached out over the past three days to check on me.  

I’m fine.  

I think.  

I got into bed last night around 2:00 and was worried that as soon as I pulled the covers over me, my knee, ankle and leg would start to hurt.  

There was nothing.  

Nada.  

Zilch.

We turned out the light and the next thing I knew Adam as asking why I set my alarm for my day off. 

I told him and it is true, because I didn’t want to sleep the day away.  

I did however, reset the alarm for 12:30 and did go back to sleep.

I finally got up around 1:00.  

I stepped on the floor only to discover my foot was asleep. 

I shook it.

There was no tingling.

I shook it again.  

No tingling. 

I hobbled into my office.

My foot was numb.  Asleep.  No tingling.  

I showered and it was still numb.

It’s now 12:30 tonight and it’s still numb.  

I can feel the ball of my foot.  I cannot feel anything to the left of my big toe on my left foot.  

Completely numb.

It’s made walking tricky today.

Couple that with intense pain in my knee, my ankle and now my calf feels like I’ve just had the charley horse of all charley horses.  

Today, June 13^th, is the first day since October that I’ve thought I might not make it through the summer with my knee.  

I ran a couple of errands today.

Then met my friends Bob and Jen and Michelle and Lisa to have dinner and see a play.  

Getting in to dinner was a struggle.

Getting up the two flights of stairs to our balcony seats was a struggle.  

Getting down to the restroom after the show was a struggle.  

I’m in my office now.

Sitting still.

My calf is fucking tight.  Like just I ran a marathon tight.

I called the doctor again today.  He is still out of town.

The assistant was about as helpful as he was yesterday.

Fun fact, they still haven’t called in my pain meds.  

They truly want me to believe the numbness in my foot has nothing to do with the bones that I can feel crunching together every time I move my left leg.  

I still have an appointment on Thursday.  I have asked Adam to go with me, as I sometimes don’t advocate for myself as loudly and forcibly as I should.  

In the meantime, I am going to work tomorrow and try to get through the day.

Keep your fingers crossed that I don’t lose feeling in my whole foot and fall down a flight of steps.  

I’d like to speak to the manager!!!

No really.  

Can I speak with the manager!!!

Today is Monday.  Was Monday.  

For the past three nights I’ve been kept awake by my knee.   Pain radiating from my knee to my shin, my calf and my ankle.  

Friday night was horrible. 

So horrible that I took 2 of the pain pills I have with no luck.  It didn’t touch it.  

I had also had two bourbons one before, one after the pain pills.  I was miserable.  

Around 4:00 a.m. I actually called my doctor.  I didn’t know what to expect on a Saturday morning at 4:00, but I was desperate.  I left a message.  They called back around 5:30.  I remember talking to them but I couldn’t tell you anything I said.  I’d been asleep by the time they called, and with the medicine and the bourbon I was out of it.  

I felt off all day on Saturday.  

Saturday night around 3:00 a.m. the pain was back.  

I didn’t take anything stronger than Advil and Tylenol on Saturday night.   

For the 2^nd night in a row, my knee kept me awake not to mention Adam who couldn’t sleep because I kept tossing and turning.  

Last night was the worst of the three.  

I spent about 60 minutes in bed before I moved to the couch.  

I couldn’t get comfortable. 

The pain was intense. 

I finally fell asleep on the couch and woke up around 5:30. I moved to the bed.  Fell asleep and the next thing I knew the alarm was going off at 11:30.  

When I got in the car today, I called my doctor.  

Someone answered and I let them know that I had new pain.  Different than before.   It was emanating from my knee but was focused in my shin, calf and ankle.  

It also only starts once I get into bed, and had dissipates by the time I get up.  

I needed something to allow me to sleep as I had not slept in three days.  

I was told someone would get back to me.  

It was 12:05.  

At 4:00 no one had called back.  

I called again.  

Got someone who was just answering the phone.  

She found the notes and told me that they’d decided it was a primary physician issue.  

I asked how my knee was getting referred back to my PCP.  I also asked why no one had called to let me know this.  And I asked why I my PCP had not been notified since it was the same practice.  

She took my information and told me someone would call back.  I gave her my work number as I don’t get service on my cell at work.   

At 5:00 my cell phone rings and it’s the doctor’s office.  

I guess they ignored my request to call my cell.

I head outside so the call won’t drop.  

I am told that my doctor is on vacation, but my request has been evaluated by another doctor.  

And this is where things got weird.  

I am told that there is no way the pain can be caused by my knee.  

I am told that if it were a real issue that it wouldn’t “mysteriously” be gone in the morning.  

I am told that perhaps it’s a nerve issue.  

I am told that I can only have 6 pills, that’s all I am getting.  

And I’m told this,  three more times before the call ends. 

I’m told that I am only getting Oxycodine at least three other times.  

I’m told that I really should have contacted my primary care physician.  

He confirms my pharmacy and tells me again that I am only getting 6 pills.  

He then tells me that there is no way the pain occurs when I lie down and goes away when I get up, which is strange because it’s been that way for almost a year now.   

There is more weirdness. 

Finally, the call ends. 

And I feel like a drug addict.  

Without using the words I’ve been made to feel like I’m shopping for drugs.  

Let’s break this down for you.

First, if this ploy has been to shop for drugs it’s the longest con in the history of cons.  

I’ve been seeing my knee doctor for more than 6 years.  I never asked for anything, until last December when things got really bad.  Even then.  Only at night.  For sleep. 

Every time I see him, including last Thursday I ask if it’s safe to take the medicine I do have.  I’m terrified of being addicted.  

And truly, addicts can be tricky.  I mean, I managed to fuck up my knee, get bone on bone arthritis, a torn meniscus, with a piece of the meniscus floating around in there, with bone-on-bone bruising, and it’s fucking fractured all so 6 years later I can con them for pain meds. 

It’s a seriously long fucking con.  

Here’s the thing Adam pointed out to me.  

I am more tolerant of pain than anyone I know.  

I lay in bed for two days with a stomach ache without going to the hospital.  When I got to the hospital, I was in the hallway in a pair of boxer shorts, that I had pooped, still with no pain medicine, waiting to be treated. (2003 at St. Vincent’s Hospital). 

I got nothing for my pain until I was put under for surgery.

My appendix had burst. 

I have been given Oxycodine, many, many times.  For my oral surgery.  For surgery on my butt.  For my gall bladder.   I’ve taken one of those pills in the entire time.  Because the nurse told me after my glad bladder not to be a hero and just do it.  I took one.  

In fact, we just got rid of four bottles of the pills in February.  With only one missing.  

When I broke my foot, I walked home two miles on it, without a tear.    

I tolerate pain.  

Most of you’d say you are at a 10 when I’m at a 4.  

Adam assured me that I’d have never reached out Friday or today if I weren’t suffering.  

I even asked today, is there something else that I can do?  Ice?  Heat?  Wrap it.  

At no time, did I ever believe the guy thought I actually had any pain.  

And the icing on the cake. 

He confirmed my pharmacy information.

I texted Adam and asked if he could please, please, please sneak out of work to pick it up.  

When he got there.

No prescription.

I should have known, CVS texts me when it is phoned in and again when it’s ready.  

I took my time coming home tonight because turning off the light to go to bed scares me.  

I can’t suffer through another night of this.  

I have slept about 4 hours each of the last three nights.  

I don’t want to not sleep tonight because it’s my day off tomorrow and I want to enjoy it.  

I’ve also caught myself being grumpy at work, because I’m fucking tired.  

And I don’t want to call again tomorrow and be treated like a criminal.  

I do have an appointment with my knee doctor on Thursday, who will be back from vacation.

But once again, I don’t want to go and be told I’m crazy.

After my phone call today, I googled, can shin and ankle pain be caused by arthritis in the knee? 

Can knee arthritis cause shin and calf pain?

“Yes, calf pain and knee pain are usually linked to some degree. If you have arthritis, you may experience pain the radiates from the knee to the calf. Arthritic joint discomfort is primarily caused by inflammation.”

I didn’t go to medical school, but seriously I’m not stupid.  

And I really think it’s because the pain in my knee has gotten much worse in the last month and I can feel my gait has changed.  I= hobble and tense the left leg, which is probably putting stress on the calf muscle, the shin and the ankle.  

But you know, it has nothing to do with the knee.  

I’d like to speak to the manager!!!

Some people are only happy when they are miserable.

We had a reservation tonight for a table of four.

I didn’t notice the name until the first person arrived.

He let us know that she is the owner of a business in town and eats here all the time.

She indeed owns a business in town.

She in fact does not eat here all the time.

She dines with us twice a year.

And she’s horrible every time she comes in.

Last time she yelled at me because I didn’t give her the table she wanted.

Tonight she especially kind to the server.

How you ask?

By criticizing the restaurant for the whole meal.

The server only told me a couple of stories.

My favorite was that she was angry we don’t have baked potatoes. I mean it’s really not that hard to bake a potato. Or make rice pilaf.

She’s oblivious when the server explains our concept.

She continues that people who eat steak like baked potatoes.

I tell the server to ask if we buy shoes in her retail store.

People like to buy shoes.

Or perhaps a cordless drill.

I mean she owns a retail store.

She should cater to everyone.

Meanwhile.

She’s miserable.

I’d like to speak to the manager!!!

Do not.

I repeat do not.

Wait.

Back story.

Any restaurant deals with lots of vendors.

Some we do business with.

A lot of them are hustling for business.

I don’t envy them. I’d be a horrible sakes person.

Someone would tell me know and I’d say okay great.

A lot of the people we do business with I’ve known for years. I consider them friends.

So.

I haven’t ever commented.

But here’s two requests.

Do not show up at the host stand at 5:15 on Friday wanting to taste your beers.

Fun fact. We are open.

The chef/owner is cooking.

And I appreciate you going to your car to get an info sheet.

I filed it in the trash can at the host stand.

And for your sake, never, ever, come in to my restaurant and taste your rum with the 22 year old bartender who has no purchasing authority and no decision making authority.

You are now facilitating an employee drinking on the job.

Even if it’s just a few sips.

And we are certainly never buying your product now.

Also I don’t think it’s cool that you poured your rum into a container that you brought in that was unlabeled, unsealed, and left it with the bartender.

Please.

Do not do these things.